You want to get saved by her,
get close to her,
disect her carisma and magic.
And finally learn how to be like her.
But you are ashamed of these egoistic, parasitlike
You are intimidated by her being,
and for each centimetre that you get closer to her you become more and more nervous.
Because she is so effortless, so real.
Because she is the opposite of everyone you know.
And you will achieve your goal eventually.
You will get close to her.
The two of you will create stories together.
Millions of stories.
And you will realize that your inner conflict can only be solved by her breakdown.
By you feeling superior, that you have the upper hand.
And that too happens.
But you will, stil and always, respect her too much to tell her that your roles have changed.
And in fact. They have not.
Because even when she will be down at the very bottom
and you will still have still have your position
somewhere in the safe middle
you will still remain the observer
and she the hero of the story.